Are you a negative Nancy or a positive Poppy today……?

Tomorrow Girl

Turning negatives into positives.

I remember working in the country side, It was a mild-march morning, a Tuesday and I’d arrived at work for 8am.  As I approached the long cobbled lane, I’d see a glimpse of the beautiful old building I worked in, the lushness’ of green country views and playful lambs. I felt grateful for mild march mornings, the never-ending views, working in an old historic building and the smell of flowers all around.

Week two. It was a mild March morning, a Tuesday, I arrived at work for 8 am, I drove up the same cobbled lane, I saw an old bleak building, dull flat views, I felt the cold breeze of a mild march morning, and the animals looked glum. I didn’t notice the flowers.

Same time. Same place. Same views. Different mind-set.

I’ve always been an analyser and an over thinker.  Both a curse and a blessing.  The positives that come…

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A little light ……

Tomorrow Girl

Depression-

Majority of us will have experienced this in some form, whether its having it yourself, knowing someone who’s had it, or feel you have dipped your toe into it from time to time but never fully slipped.

I wanted to fill this blog full of positive messages and positive feelings, as I want others to feel good when they read it and motivated to take care of themselves when facing challenges.¬† But I am also aware of how patronising it is to tell someone who is going through depression to ‚Äúthink positive‚ÄĚ, ‚Äúhappiness is there for you‚ÄĚ or ‚Äúappreciate what you have.‚Ä̬† As when you are in that place, you do want to think positive, you do appreciate those around you, but you are just living in your head so much, that you may not show it, and you would do anything to feel happy again.¬† But that murky‚Ķ

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A little Ray of Sunshine………

Recovery is long isn’t it. Whether it’s recovering from surgery, mental health, addiction….it can feel like a long slog¬†to feeling like your bright, shiny, self again……but we¬†will get there. And it will all be worth it.¬†

I am all for living in the moment, making the most of the now.¬† But sometimes you just need a little exercise to lift your spirits and take¬†your mind off of¬† ‘a difficult/¬†mundane time or long¬†recovery,’¬†and it‚Äôs great to have a few things to look forward to in the pipe line.

So today I got thinking about summer. Ok, I know it’s only April, but we‚Äôve all had a little taste of the¬†sunshine, and it’s gone to our heads. ( I hope I wasn’t the¬†only one who was¬†stressing out that I have¬†zero summer clothes, frantically looking online for a new wardrobe, for all 3 days of sun we had.) ¬†But it¬†did get¬†me thinking about this summer, and how I would like to spend it.

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I’ll be spending the majority of my summer in Brighton. I love Brighton, it’s definitely my happy place.¬†¬†I’m not sure exactly why I love Brighton, but I do remember after a stressful day at work, when I stop, breathe and look around me. I felt an overwhelming feeling of gratitude and content ness to be in such a happy, colourful and vibrant city. So choosing to live here was an easy decision.

I told myself¬†I would do so many things last summer in Brighton and due to life , work and knee problems, I didn‚Äôt get round to even half.¬† So this summer I intend to make more time.¬† So what better way to lift the spirits, than to write your own summer bucket list.¬†¬† It’s not about jumping off bridges ( unless that’s your thing ). But about looking for reasons to celebrate, and enjoy the places we live, doing things we love,¬†no matter how small.

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Here’s my list for anyone visiting Brighton, or like me surgery recovery has been such a slog, you just need a little something to look forward to.


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  • Be tourists for the day down¬†Brighton Pier.
  • Go to more open mic nights (Love the Brunswicke pub in Hove for this .)
  • Eat Fatto Mano Pizza ( the best ) on the lawns on a warm summer evening.
  • Watch more coastal sunsets.
  • Check out as many new Coffee shops ( Hixon Green, Flour Pot Bakery & Red rooster faves )
  • Have a picnic in St Anne‚Äôs Gardens.
  • Dance the day away at Gay Pride
  • Cycle from Brighton to Hove beach ( little hopeful, but if knee is willing)
  • Join a yoga class above Six in Hove (once knee recovered)
  • Try out more Vegan restaurants.
  • Host a big BBQ
  • Summer evening date night at Theatre Royal
  • Summer day drinking on Brighton Beach.
  • Go to Brighton Food festival.
  • Watch more live gigs/ comedy (Komedia Comedy Club is the most popular¬†)
  • Stroll along the colourful north laines and buy some vintage bits.
  • Read books on Hove Lawns and dog watch ( So many cute puppies down there.)

Feeling better already. 

Ready to soak up the season.¬†¬†Now roll on the sunshine………….

x Happy Saturday x

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Good vibrations….

I am sure if the majority of us, if¬†asked, how we would like to imagine our ideal home atmosphere, it would include some of the words, happy, calm, peaceful.¬† We wouldn’t tend to use the words chaotic, stressful and intense.¬† Although¬†Its not always easy being positive and happy at home, mainly due to life duties, relationships and work life balance, but we can all try and create a¬†better atmosphere at home when possible.

  I am always looking for things that help improve my mood, wellbeing and give me a balanced happy lifestyle.  So for the past several months, I have become increasingly more intrigued by the world of Holistic Healing, and positive energies, especially around creating more of a positive energy at home, seeing as that is where I am spending most of my time currently post-surgery.


Crystals and Gem stones.

I have started to enjoy learning more about gemstones and crystals. They are everywhere and popping up more and more. What are the meanings behind these beautiful stones? And which ones should I include in my own home, or on my body? ¬†So, they say the best way to learn,¬†¬†if it‚Äôs for you, is to get your hands on the gemstones. Luckily living in arty Brghton I am spoilt for choices, but after hearing great things about a supplier near me, ‚Äė’ The Gemstoners.‘‚Äô I gave them a visit.

Not only are these products healers and cleansers, but they also all look amazing too. And the staff were so helpful and informative, being someone still learning and intrigued.

I was advised by a lady, to choose the stone you are drawn to, I was instantly drawn to;

Amethyst-  Balance, Protection and Healing. This stone has a calming influence, soothes stress and encourages balanced thinking.

Labradorite ‚Äď A useful companion through change, banishes fear, insecurities and strengthens faith in self.

Gemstones are said to have health, wellbeing and mood benefits, and enrich the life of those who wear them or keep them in their home.  I chosen to keep one on me as a necklace and one at home.  I am so IN LOVE with these beautiful gemstones, their healing properties and I am ready to introduce them into my life.

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Positive Affirmations

Surrounding yourself with a few healthy reminders can only be a positive. From cards, art work, diary notes, to a screensaver on your work computer. A happy, healthy, mantra to go by, or a reminder to focus on when you need it.
I asked a local artist to paint this quote for me. Seeing as I am at home a lot this painting is now above my dressing table as a gentle reminder. And makes me feel more positive.

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Aromatherapy and Essential Oils.

Negative energy and emotions are all around us, so creating the opposite at home is vital to our wellbeing, You can use essential oils to create this positive energy within your home.  You know that feeling when you walk into a spa, the atmosphere, smell and energy.  I get that same feeling in the evening when I create a relaxed scene, light music, a bubble bath and my favourite essential oils on the burner.  I want to create that at home more. So I tend to use;

Evening ‚Äď Lavender or Bergamot- for a calming peaceful effect, which always helps me sleep better.

Daytime ‚Äď I use peppermint or Orange – Helps me feel sharp and focused on my daily tasks. Lemon and oranges oils can be great for mood improvers at any point during the day.

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Beyond anything else, collecting crystals and gemstones, learning to use different essential oils, should be fun, enriching, and interesting. Get out and experience whatever you can, and see for yourself.

And I’m all for feeling calm. balanced and surrounding myself with positive energies …… listen to your intuition, and play around with things! Have fun in finding what suits you!

Everything is energy and energy is everything.

Happy Healing XxX

 

Sweet Little April……

So April is upon us.

There‚Äôs something about April. You know that feeling everyone gets when the clock strikes midnight on new year, and we all start confidently listing new routines, and better choices we are ‘definitely’ going to be making.¬† Well April kind of has that effect on me. I love spring and the start of some lighter, happier days, so I literally do¬†have, a spring in my step.¬†

Here are a few things I have been doing this month, that have made me noticeably happier. 


Organising your spring wardrobe

Since knee surgery, I am still rocking about like it’s 1998 when sporty Spice was a fashion icon. ¬†So I thought I would begin to organise my wardrobe, out with the old and buy myself some spring staples. A bit of retail therapy is good for the soul.¬† I am loving baskets bags, anything yellow (bring on the sunshine,)¬†cute blouses,¬†and tan sandals. (Ok¬†there’s a lot of wishful thinking that spring will be warm.)¬† But If you haven’t already, treat yourself to a new spring item.¬†

You deserve it right.


Buying  Flowers.

It may seem like nothing, but buying some daffodils or tulips on the weekly shop, and placing them on the kitchen window makes me feel happier. And who doesn’t like flowers.

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Getting Healthy-

Ok maybe I was meant to start this in January, but I didn’t.¬† Instead I¬†sat on the sofa seeing how many biscuits¬†I could eat in 8 weeks, (I did well.)¬†¬† So I am starting now.
I recently completed the, “21 days to break a habit,” ¬†banning biscuits, chocolate and cake (crying silently onto key board.) And it is true what they say,¬† 21 days in, and I was¬†bypassing Jaffa cakes, and heading for an orange for a snack.¬†And I’m feeling great for it.¬† Give it a go. 21 day challenge.

April is all about healthy eating for me. Goodbye Cakes.

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Exercising more.

It’s¬†difficult to find the motivation to exercise after 8 weeks of sitting on your backside recovering from surgery, the only exercise I had been doing was lifting the¬†TV remote.¬†But now I am able to stand up for short periods of time,¬† I have no excuse.¬†¬†So I have tried to fill my week with activities to feel good. I bought some boxing gloves and pads, to practise in the living room with the boyf. ¬† I joined a really quiet gym round the corner from me, and started some soft gentle swimming pool exercises for the knee. Feeling good.¬† So¬†if like me you didn’t start in January, April is the one.


Listening to Podcasts more.

I have talked before about morning routine effecting the mood you hold for the rest of the day The good, The bad & The ugly‚Ķ.¬† I have just started listening to Fearne Cottons new podcast ‚ÄėHappy Place.‚Äô Fearne ¬†interviews¬†¬†people In the public eye,¬†to find out their secret to staying happy and basically keeping their shit together. I loved the Dawn French and Stephen Fry one.¬† I’d recommend it to anyone¬†wanting a¬†calming start to the day, or¬† morning drive to work.

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Beauty regimes.

I was walking through Debenhams yesterday, when I was asked by a very cheery lady, with glowing skin, wearing the brightest shade of red lipstick I have ever seen….. if I needed a face mask that smelt of coconuts and hydrates¬†the face ? …….Errrr YEAH I do !!¬† It’s called GLOW -CO-NUTS, by Origins,¬†and it smells like a dream, and does exactly what it says on the tin. I am so glad I invested.

We all know any kind of recovery can make you feel like a slow, sluggish, mess. So now my spirits have lifted I am making sure I am doing a little extra with my beauty regime . I face mask , paint my nails, put on some aromatherapy burners and listen to music once a week and it’s been great for a little self care and distraction.

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Choosing happier TV choices.

Don’t get me wrong, If I see the¬†title, ‘ worlds worst serial killers,’ pop up on my¬†TV, I’m pressing series link !! ¬†I love anything crime related, the darker the better. But seeing as recovery from surgery has been a bit of an emotional ride,¬†and I¬†am starting to feel more human, and positive again, I¬†would like to keep it that way.¬† So for anyone else who feels like they have been living in a dark cave for a while, and are wanting to feel a little brighter, I’d definitely recommend looking at your TV show choices.

I’d recommend the series ‘LOVE’ on Netflix, its cool, easy to watch, and funny mostly. Which makes it perfect feel good TV.¬†¬†

‘Queer eye, for the straight guy’ This is so uplifting you’ll forget¬†why you were even in a mood, after¬†watching one episode.

What are you watching that makes you happier ?!


Watching the sunset.

The days are getting lighter and the sunsets are more beautiful. I have taken time to slow down, enjoy the little things, watching the sunset and feel grateful for my day.

 

 

April ‚Äď You‚Äôre the best x

 

Facing Fears

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I never thought I would write a blog.¬† I‚Äôve always felt a little unsure about them.¬† Like the world has gone mad.¬† Everyone wants to paint a picture of their¬† ‚ÄėSo called perfect life,‚Äô that‚Äôs not so perfect in reality.¬† Everyone‚Äôs an expert.¬† Sally went to Phuket for two weeks and now has an ‚Äėexpertise‚Äô travel blog.¬† Barry did an online course for ¬£40 and is now a nutritional bone structure adviser, (it could be a thing.)¬† That was until I came across a blog that changed how I felt.¬† A blog that I could relate to.¬† It gave me the extra push I needed to face my fears, and have a much needed surgery I had put off for 7 years.¬† And I thought, well if a blog can help others like that, it’s worth becoming a ‘blogger.’

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See I used to be someone who ran away from fears, ¬†shoved anything scary I could, so far under the rug.¬† From relationship problems, to serious health matters.¬† My partner so much as tried to speak to me about my dislocating knee’s, I would feel a surge of panic come over me, and shut the conversation down.¬† As a born worrier, which lends itself nicely to anxiety, being told I needed my legs broken and realigned, was something I was waaaay to anxious to ever face.

I had always been this way, even in other areas in my life.¬† Putting off that dreaded, ‚Äė We need to talk,’ conversation with a partner, or spending years suffering with depression, yet not wanting to face it and ask for help.¬† I just ignored, in hope everything would just go away.¬† Facing my fears was never my strong suit.

But it dawned on me this morning just how much has changed in my life, since I actually started facing fears head on.¬† Two years on not only did I talk, and get help for depression, I finally had, and am recovering from the much needed knee surgery.¬† And also now able to face any kind of confrontation, plus I met someone¬†who loves and supports me.¬† ¬†Now, I’m not writing this as a,¬† ‘Hey, come over here and look at how great I’m doing.’¬† But in a way of, I never thought two years on I would actually feel proud of where I am, so I know It’s a place anyone putting of fears right now, can come to.¬†

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The changes happened as I slowly started putting myself out there more, and started facing fears in my personal life, and work life, so out of  my comfort zone, that my anxieties actually began to decrease, therefore my happiness increased. 

So have you had a niggle for a while that your too scared to face?  Be it a relationship problem ?  Work issue ? An addiction you don’t want to admit you have?  A health scare you know you need to deal with? Or a relationship you know you need to walk away from?  Now, I am no expert, but my experience of facing fears are, it makes you feel empowered, strong, and I would never want to go back to that girl running away from everything that she feared.

So tell yourself today, you will be brave, and take those baby steps towards those fears. 

I was once told it feels better to move towards a problem , than it does away from it‚Ķ….

They were right.  x

The good, The bad & The ugly….

Depression is so rude isn’t it. The way it just shows up uninvited, waves over you, and slaps you around the face.  As if dealing with a major surgery isn’t big enough alone, but delivering it with a heap of depression and anxiety to, well thanks very much.

Do you ever wake up and just know it’s going to be a bad mental health day ?!¬† I felt really angry with my brain recently.¬† So I had a little word. It went like this. ” Not only do I give you a healthy break from the TV, I eat well, I read, I stay positive, I even meditate,¬†and this is how you re-pay me?¬† With a gloomy feeling from my old enemy depression ?!¬† Ok, I’ve not lost it.¬† But after this little chat, I then realised, there had been a few patterns in my daily routine, that had lead me to this negative¬†place.¬† ¬†Now more than ever, I realise¬†just how much our daily routines effect our minds.¬† I’ve really had to make a conscious effort during this recovery, to take care of my mind, not just my body. And I can definitely¬†feel the difference on the days I make those efforts, and those days that I don‚Äôt.

With any kind of recovery there are going to be some good, some bad, and some pretty ugly days. Two months post opp, I think I have now covered an array of these.¬† I previously wrote a post about preparing the mind, body and soul for surgery. Preparing your, Mind . Body . Soul.¬† But now sitting at 6 weeks post op, it’s a very different challenge¬†sustaining a positive¬†mind.¬† So I wanted to share a few of the things that I have been doing, to keep my mind, well‚Ķ Well.¬†¬†

For those going through post surgery, have a surgery coming up, are in a form of recovery, or for those who just suffer with glum days.  None of our situations may be exactly the same, but we are all healing, and we are all on our own paths, to self improvement. 

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First up;


Morning routine

This is a huge one for me. Start the day, how you want the rest of the day to follow.

Morning one ‚Äď Wake up, scrolls on phone, scrolls on phone, eat cereal, scrolls on phone, watch TV, get dressed.¬†

11 am  feelings = Fed up. Tired.  Low mood.

Morning two ‚Äď Wake up, stretch, open curtains, wash, get dressed, healthy breakfast, TV off, scroll on phone (15 minutes)‚Ķ.onto something productive.

11 am feelings =  Positive. Happy. Motivated.


Change things up.

¬†If like me your mobility is restricted at the moment, it sounds silly but change where you sit.¬† Six weeks of laying with your leg up in the same place can become very mundane. I now make sure I sit in different places, and change up my views. It’s amazing what this can do for your mind. I used to get told, take a different route to work from time to time, go by train instead of driving, and it works. Changing the small things up, can help your state of mind for the rest of the day more than you realise.¬†¬†


Accept where you are.

From talking to others going through a similar recovery, the one word I have noticed we all throw around (including myself) is, ‘frustration’.¬† You didn‚Äôt want this injury, this physical hindrance,¬† you don’t want to be in that place. You want to be further along.¬† You should be further along.¬† See I was born with two legs out of alignment¬†both are weak, sore and have dislocated too many times to remember. I am now healing from the surgery and have been guilty of¬† throwing around the words, ”Why can’t I have normal legs.”¬† I am grateful¬†and lucky enough to not have had a life threatening¬†surgery,¬† but sometimes frustration can get the better of us.¬† Accept where you are.¬† You¬†can‚Äôt control everything about the healing process, but you can control how you feel, and where you go from here.


Make some small plans.

Being cooped up in recovery is tough on the mind, and there really is such a thing as Netflix¬†and too much chill ! I’ve found making small plans for the day, keeps my mind more productive while I’m off work. ¬†I planned¬†to do a dinner party ( sounds like nothing, but with a stiff leg, on crutches, it’s an ordeal.) I planned to sort out my clothes drawers and de-clutter, sounds boring, but wow it feels good after doesn‚Äôt it. And of course just arrange to see people.¬† The little things make all the difference¬†as we all know. Complete a 30 day self care challenge¬†during recovery.¬†Lets Start as we mean to go on‚Ķ..


Get dressed.

Ok, you may not have anywhere to be, you don‚Äôt have a visitor today, who’s to impress‚Ķ.So what ?! Get out those damn, comfy pjs, and put on some normal people clothes.¬† I’v been pretty good at this, and on the couple of days I haven’t¬†got dressed, I definitely¬†felt a difference in my mood. It will give you a little more motivation to start your day.


Sleeping plan

First week or so after surgery, medication can make you feel drowsy and you may take naps, go ahead you have been through an ordeal let your body rest. But after this, if it’s just laziness, stop. Sleeping in the day time and staying up late at night, will only make you feel like utter rubbish. So keep your sleeping pattern strict, and the same as it was before. I am always tired, but I keep myself up till 9 pm ( wooo go me ) . The nights that I did stay up late, and slept in the day, were my lowest and most anxious days. So take note of how you feel and learn from the mistakes.¬†


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These are just a few of the things that I have noticed help my mind during recovery so far, the most.¬† You may have others that have helped you.¬† Our roads to recovery can seem long, bumpy, and no one person’s is the same.

The truth is we are all moving forward, day by day, it’s just hard to see at times.¬†

It takes time, patience and everything you’ve got.   

Happy Healing xXx

(Now……get out those pjs x )